A 27 year old woman was caught fleeing from a Walgreens without paying for a $30 bottle of Elizabeth Arden cologne, along with bright green nail polish and long black fake eyelashes.
While this case could have easily been handled by the Fashion Police, the actual cops tried to get on it. Ermith Emonfils approached the officers with calls of "Sex? Sex?" before resorting to what I can only call "biological warfare."
After this point, I can't even use my own words. I'll use theirs, and properly cite them.
As officers put her in a patrol car, she "grabbed behind her and pointed a well-used and bloody female sanitary napkin" at two officers.
Both officers told her to drop the well used and bloody female sanitary napkin, but the suspect refused," the affidavit states. "I delivered a firm, lawful command to the suspect to drop the object and told her it was gross."
(TC Palm)
Ho..ly...smokes.
So I salute you for your f***ing gross creativity. Course, there's a reason people don't do things like that.
And, though I balk at saying it...HOORAY FLORIDA.
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